Tuesday, September 10, 2013

A Moment of Genuine Freedom

Radical Acceptance reverses our habit of living at war with experiences that are unfamiliar, frightening or intense. It is the necessary antidote to years of neglecting ourselves, years of judging and treating ourselves harshly, years of rejecting this moment's experience. Radical Acceptance is the willingness to experience ourselves and our life as it is. A moment of Radical Acceptance is a moment of genuine freedom. 
-Tara Brach in Radical Acceptance

What is freedom to you? In what ways are you neglecting yourself, judging yourself or rejecting opportunities to change your life because you continuously make excuses to not follow through?

 Freedom to me is being able to buy my own house, perhaps work from home full time eventually, become a stay at home fur Momma, find that one person who makes my world stop and to feel comfortable and sexy in my own skin. I sometimes question if this is all possible but deep down I know if I commit to being consistent every single day I will succeed. There may be others in my life that do not believe I can accomplish all this but it does not matter, because I know I can. 

I think a big part of the reason why I do not always believe in myself is because my father always used to tell me I was making excuses, even when I was telling the truth, he would say I was lying or making excuses. I think after hearing it over and over again, you start to believe it, especially at a young age. It began around the time I was five and has been an ever present comment throughout my entire life. Going through formative years hearing this certainly has an impact on someone's habits and psyche. It is hard breaking that mold but again, if I am consistent and believe in myself every single day, I know I can accomplish great things. Including, but not limited to, having the body I have always wanted. I have already overcome a great number of my symptoms thanks to Clean eating, what is one more?

It is raining today and I can really only feel the fatigue on days like today however I will not let it stop me. I plan to eat Clean the remainder of the day and do my double workout. I am down two pounds from Monday and I plan to keep heading in the right direction. Determination + Belief will be the key to my success.

I have come to terms with where my life has been and how it has played out thus far but part of Radical Acceptance is facing that pain and truth and knowing how to change it in the future and that's what I intend to do.

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