Day 2
Construction Status: Foundation
Weight: No Change
Size: No Change
Yesterday, finding out that I'm probably Lactose Intolerant finally hit me. No cheese, yogurt, milk, ice cream, nuts, eggs, etc. Things like pizza, Greek yogurt, eggs, breakfast sandwiches, milk (I usually drink a LARGE glass of milk almost every day and have cereal for breakfast), ice cream with fresh fruit and chocolate hard top, anything Delmonico, anything chocolate, ohhhhh chocolate!
On the flip side though, the benefit is actually having skin! If this works, if the fact that I'm Lactose Intolerant proves to be true then it means I'll actually have beautiful skin. One thing that doctors always seem to call this disorder is cosmetic. We can never get health insurance coverage on the proper medications, etc because insurance doesn't cover anything cosmetic related. I probably could have gotten laser treatment or something to get rid of the bumps that cover 75% of my body but insurance definitely will not cover it, just like they refused to cover the proper medication for my hair loss but said that once I went bald they do cover wigs, HAH! I would rather look good, have my skin, have my hair, have my natural body weight and feel a little sicker than I do now, than look the way I do. If this was my fault, if I was a true fat kid and I didn't exercise or eat fairly healthy, naturally I would be disappointed in myself and try to change it but the most frustrating thing about this disease is that it's very hard to find a balance for what works to change your body. Now to add taking out pretty much all of my favorite foods just so my skin can look normal, it's upsetting.
The thing that bothers me more than anything is the fact that doctors are willing to help but at the same time they seem to have an 'oh well' attitude towards it. No one, except for MAYBE Australia has tried to do a study on it, which boggles my mind because it's directly related to heart health. If this is true, heart disease is the number one killer of women. Who knows if a lot of the women who have died from it had PCOS? How many lives would have been saved if doctors actually paid attention and looked into this disorder more. This disorder is constantly surrounded by frustration on all sides. They should just say right upfront that there probably won't be any real progress regarding the disorder in your lifetime and if there is, it'll probably be when you're far past your prime. Sorry we've screwed with your happiness for the better part of your life, but hey we found a solution now. Everyone deserves a full and happy life as a carefree gorgeous woman, and this disorder really puts a damper in all of it. People can tell you you're gorgeous but besides my face, I've never really felt it. We all deserve to feel it. If the cruise comes to be, I've decided we need to take tons of pictures in which we ALL look hellah sexy! Until next time my cysters.
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